Spuds Glorious Spuds!

Spuds glorious spuds.

Bintje, Bismark, Blue Zarr, Carlingford, Desiree, Dutch Cream, King Edward, Kipfler, Nicola, Pink Eyes, Pink Fir Apple, Pontiacs, Russet Burbank, Sebago.

Baking, boiling, frying, mashing, pureeing, roasting, salads, steaming.

Christmas lunch is fast approaching and there has been concern that potatoes, to be baked to perfection, may be in short supply.

Heaven forbid!

Potatoes have been a staple of our diets since European arrival. Captain James Cook brought spuds on his ships in 1770.

The starchy delights were first grown in Tasmania in 1803 when Governor Lieutenant John Bowen planted a crop at Risdon Cove. By 1826 we were exporting spuds to Sydney.

In the early days, varieties included Redskins, Bismark from Germany and, at the turn of the century, Pink Eyes, which were prevalent at South Arm.

By 2021 Tasmania produced 457,000 tonnes of potatoes with 100,000 of those manufactured into crinkle cut, hash browns, potato gems, and all those other starchy delights that line supermarket cold stores.

I am a potato aficionado. Growing up I can't remember an evening meal that didn't contain spuds.

For our family, mashed was best.

I am still so incredibly fussy about mashed potatoes that any hint of a lump renders the food inedible. Hence my need to mash and tap mash and tap.

The process starts with either washed spuds for convenience or dirty spuds for a sense of fresh perfection:

1. Peel the starchy delights then rinse and peel in part again to remove any eyes or fork marks or nasty decaying residue.

2. With a sharpened kitchen knife dissect the potatoes ensuring the chunks are the right size (not too big taking too long to boil nor too small turning them into mush) by cutting into thirds, and then sixths (depending on the size of the spud).

3. Either boil cold water and add salt (not required!) or run the tap water until hotter than a finger can take, before placing the spuds in the saucepan and bringing to the boil.

4. As the pot reaches 100deg Celsius slightly lift the lid to prevent the starchy residue from spilling over and leaving a mess on the stove top.

5. After 20 minutes use a thin metal skewer to test the softness but not a fork because that will just split the goodness creating dreaded mush.

6. Drain the water and return to the hob to remove moisture.

7. Add a healthy measure of butter, a splash of milk, and rifle through the cutlery drawer to locate the spud masher, which is usually right in front of you.

(A dear friend uses a fork to curate the smoothest mash. I had heard of this technique but I am not that skilled nor patient!)

8. Serve while piping hot, add your favourite gravy should you choose (not required!), before devouring the starchy goodness with fervour.

9. Mashed potatoes must be smooth, not lumpy nor puréed, because it's the fluffy, peaky consistency aficionados crave.

10. Serve hot with assorted vegetables and meat, or with sausages and baked beans.

But what will we do if there are not enough potatoes for Christmas? It would be akin to December 24-25 without Santa Claus!

Some readers may not be aware that potatoes can no longer be imported from the mainland and the rationale remains sensible.

To put at risk the Tasmanian potato industry is too devastating to contemplate. Importation of spuds raises concerns about pests and diseases, and it would also lead to potential and significant financial impact on our state's growers.

Unsurprisingly, weather has impacted both the old and new season's crops, which will still hopefully be harvested for Christmas.

The Australian Government Bureau of Meteorology is instructive regarding the current potato problem:

"Spring rainfall for Tasmania was well above average, except in the south-west.

"For the state as a whole, the total spring rainfall was 423.37 millimetres, 19.4 per cent above the 1961-1990 average.

"September rainfall was in the lowest 10 per cent of September records for a large area of the west, while most of the East Coast district had rainfall in the highest 10 per cent of September records.

"Rainfall in October was more than double the monthly average across most of northern and eastern Tasmania, but below average in the south-west.

"In November northern and eastern Tasmania had very much above average rainfall, while the south-west had close to the monthly average."

The paddocks are drenched, leaving farmers unable to move the large harvesting machinery onto sodden soil.

Bogged tractors requiring an even bigger piece of machinery to shift are left stranded waiting for the earth to harden.

As a result, farmers, much to their disappointment, have only been able to harvest 10 per cent of the required supply for this time of year.

Potatoes take 120 days to mature, a long time, but we never expect a spud shortage. It's like a water shortage in the highland lakes that feeds our hydro-electric system to create electricity.

These shortages may be uncommon, but they create inconvenience leaving us helpless when the choice is between shoestring or beer battered.

'Tis the festive season - Spuds glorious spuds.